A total stranger on the opposite end of a phone call several states away became my mirror one day, helped me see myself more clearly, and saved me from myself.
I touched a hot stove in TN and never wanted to go back again. I found out I do have to, and I had to call someone.
Thank god I called Kelsey.
I called a number for people who can see nothing but a knife, maybe a noose, or red, red blood.
I called so I wouldn’t have to dig back into my flesh and so I wouldn’t leave a mess for someone else to clean up. I hear it takes a whole team of people and apartment managers have to deal with it and I didn’t want my animals to starve.
I was still too selfish to think of my parents when I searched for the number to call.
I can be a piece of shit sometimes.
But I did call. And thank you, Kelsey. I have so much to live for and you talked to me when I did not know how to talk to anyone. Actually, I couldn’t even breathe when I first called. I was choking and dry-heaving and after you calmed me down you told me I was doing that for 45 minutes. It felt like only five minutes. That blew my mind.
Well, Kelsey, if you ever read this, I hope you will see that I am alive and well, and couldn’t be more happy.