3AM (a glutton for fucking punishment)

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Photo by Maurício Mascaro on Pexels.com

The bars turn on their lights and I am louder than they are bright

A beautiful loser makes his move so I sneak out the back door

I’m drunk enough, sure, but what for?

Get home around 2 and by 3,

my dreams are haunted by you

anyway

life is short, they say

and I won’t give myself away

I’ve always wandered

But I will not stray

It doesn’t have to be you,

But at least someone like you.

I know what I don’t want and that is to find

That on my death bed I did not do more of what I like.

Call out of work once in a while

So I can go out and be vile

Learned all the rules just to break them

Flunked out of law school and didn’t even debate them

My 3AM dreams include things,

such as you kissing me deeply and making me scream.

Saying “fuck off” more often

Getting off more often

Giving my time to others and being there

When someone else is lonely and scared.

Chasing my passions simply because I want to

Returning to an old haunt to see you

So I’m not sorry for what I have done, or plan to do

Because this feeling, neurotic beauty of youth

Youthful hope, lustful movements and impulsive decisions

I now choose this way of living

Because I like long, reckless nights, perhaps waking at 3

And having a dream of you here with me.

(To be revised)

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